kamikazeworld:

fantasticsteve:

ohyousourwolf:

Why is it that evil villains always find poison to inject into their victims like just literally fill the syringe with air and just stick the needle between their toes or something. It’ll mimic a heart attack and the victim will die pretty quick and NO ONE WILL ASK MANY QUESTIONS BECAUSE IT’LL LOOK LIKE A HEART ATTACK

first of all how do you know this information i feel like the government doesnt want you to know that

image

(via breakfastburritoe)

wytchprincess:

daughter. Get off the blue website. you have not left your room all day it is time for dinner. i’ve got some “feels” for you: they’re called pork chops and your mother made them with love

(via breakfastburritoe)

dietchola:

the best New Years text I got

dietchola:

the best New Years text I got

(via joshpecksmom)

wanksclub:

*falls purposely on the ground so hot people can help me to get back up*

(via joshpeck)

andrewsadrian:

i just saw an ad that was probably supposed to say accident lawyers but it said accidental lawyers and i can’t sotp laughing “just got my law degree aw man this wasn’t what i meant to do how am i gonna get out of this one”

(via tamagrouchi)

andrewgiraffields:

Lana Del Rey songs make me feel sad and nostalgic about things that haven’t happened to me

(via himeheishi)

typhonatemybaby:

mishawinsexster:

Friendly reminder that the Duckbill Platypus is not beaver sized but the tiniest most cutest patootie being in existence 

OH GOD

i thought these things were the size of like, large cats or something. ITS FUCKING TINY JESUS

(via himeheishi)

stressingly:

the road to success is under construction

(via himeheishi)

collapsed:

My brother just pissed me off so I spit in his face after I was done yellin at him
And now I’m in my room sitting in fear bc I think he’s gonna come attack me now

(via himeheishi)

(via tao-to-ro)